14 May 2007
posted in self
There are times when I get a glipmse of my broader me in the big picture. Not the big picture of course, but a wider perspective from a few steps back, something a little bit more global. In time and in space. These are few and far between, and I just felt compelled to write about it on this Monday morning.
I experienced one on Friday, shortly before the weekend kicked in. It materialised as a sudden breath of happiness. A connected feeling. Connected to my family, my children. Connected to my friends. Connected to my work, my clients. I felt in sync for a short while. Thoughts and feelings swamped me and I let them be. It was exhilarating go give in to this brief moment of blissfulness. To give in.
So I logged out early, and decided to roam around a few of my favourite places before heading home. I finalised the exchange of my defective Nikkor lens and cheerfully chatted and joked with the shop owner before heading for a couple of bookshops I like spending time in.
I ended up enjoying a beer on a terrasse reading LP's latest guidebook on Goa, amazed by the change of tone that has taken place over the last 10 years. The last edition I own dates back to 1996, and covered the whole of India (Gee, and the first dates back to 1982). The idea of returning to India has never left us, and has never been as vivid as of now, and probably explains part of my current euphoria.
These are times when everything is possible, self-confidence is on a high, reality is happily distorted until it catches you up, which might happen today. Or might not.
The weekend was a succession of festivities and celebrations in which I took an active part or a more comtemplative stand: Marc's birthday party, Carouge's public swimming pool opening, Isabelle and Pascal's wedding, a family reunion picnic, my nephew's end of year's ball and today Mathias' first EC evaluations. Dazzling.
Highs are usually followed by lows, acting as euphoria counter balance. A reality sanity surge protector. You get thinking about the missing ones, and how you'd like to share all this with them. I miss my mum, my sister and my dad. In different and incompatible ways, but I trust that my happiness transcends the distances and time that separates us.
It's Monday morning, 08:12a and a brave new day awaits me.
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